“I don’t get what I did to deserve this,” are the words that come from my mouth as I discuss with a friend about constantly feeling unappreciated by those who surround me- specifically those who I have put my love, energy and time on. I always ask myself am I not doing enough or am I simply not good enough. I don’t feel like people care about me the way I care about them or I just don’t feel like I’m being recognized for the love and effort I give. Why don’t they appreciate me? I constantly wonder whether I should wait for them to recognize my worth or walk out the door. What am I doing wrong?
I’ve come to a point in my life where I am battling between not only letting go of those who make me feel this way but also battling with myself. I’ve always found myself worried about the attitudes of others and how it impacts me. Like watching someone doing something without regarding how it will make me feel. Like how selfish of them? I’d sit here in complete agony and pain. But I’m here to say screw that! No one can appreciate yourself more than YOURSELF. I’ve realized that those who have good hearts like me often feel this way. We are constantly expecting to receive the same love we give. I mean hey after all we are human, right? Actually it’s quite funny. Yesterday, I received a notification from Facebook on a post I wrote last year in October saying it sucks being a good person you always lose out in the end..BUT no you don’t lose out. Ive learned that when you’re doing something from the kindest of your heart to never expect anything back. God will reward you not mankind!
Let me be the first to tell you that expectation kills! When you get into any connection with any individual whether it be a friendship or relationship be reminded not to expect anything from anyone but yourself! I know this is better said than done. Guard your heart and most importantly guard your emotions. It’s sad to say that our society has caused us to neglect what it truly means to feel. I once heard this phrase..
“it’s truly a blessing and a curse to feel so deeply”
I couldn’t agree more with this statement. Now I am not saying that you shouldn’t trust anyone or you shouldn’t put your hopes up but remember to not get too upset if things don’t go as planned. Unfortunately, people will continue to use you for what they need you for and suck you out dry. Don’t give them the power! (yes, I know I should be taking my own advice. I should know better)
Yes— I am speaking from experience. I have been lied to, disrespected, betrayed and embarrassed but these are the life lessons that’s come with living. No matter what the case is you cannot change the attitudes and behaviors of those around you. Continue to do things for your personal well being and personal success as time goes on those who truly appreciate you will stick by your side or fall through the cracks.