If I sit here and say I haven’t compared myself to others, i’d be telling a big lie! Comparing myself became a bad habit I just couldn’t seem to break. It haunted me all the way up until my junior year of college.
During my first two years of college, I was lost and I was such in a space where I felt like I can handle and do anything, literally ANYTHING! I felt as though I wasn’t receiving credit for the hard work I was doing or receiving any recognitions whatsoever. As I began to mature I compared myself to: income, job success and even the most simple things like physical features. Just a bit of a backstory.. in college I knew that I wanted a successful career after graduation and I knew I wanted to be one of the best at what I do. So to do so, I took many steps to achieve that. However, I noticed a fellow counterpart of mine was following the same career path I was doing and receiving so much credit. I began to compare myself to this person. I’d ask myself questions like: Why are they receiving so many opportunities from different companies? or Why are they getting everything I want when I work just as hard? I felt as though this person was younger than me and I should be doing better than them regardless. I should be a step ahead of them instead of vice versa. It got to the point where I started to dislike this person for no reason. Yes, this is what happens when you compare yourself to others. You begin to envy what the person has instead of seeking your own light. I mean lets be real here, its a natural human thing to compare yourself!
Comparing yourself to others is an act of violence against your authentic self.
However, I started to have a pep talk with myself. I said “ Barbara, you are you and NO ONE ELSE can be you, God has his own agenda for you and that agenda cannot be taken by no one because it is your own unique plan”. Once I started to recognize that, I started to work more for myself and on my craft. Suddenly, opportunities and recognitions started flying my way to the point where I didn’t know what to do but to just thank God for this test of patience and faith!
Its unfair to compare yourself to others. When you compare yourself to others you in-turn rob yourself of your own uniqueness, gifts and even time! Ideally, when you compare yourself to others you lose your own drive and passion and focus on someone elses. I encourage you to become more aware of yourself and your own success. Start to appreciate what you have rather than always asking for what others have. Start to ask God to tell you what he wants you to to. Also, remember that mistakes will happen and thats all in the process of learning. I promise, you’ll start to see a difference!
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Amazing post! I often find myself comparingmyself to others but I’ve realized that you can’t compare your chapter 1 to someone’s chapter 10. Everything always looks greener on the other side. Learning how to enjoy this stage of my life has helped me to focus in on what I truly want to do with my life.